Family Therapy
by Red Witch
Summary: Another deleted scene from Parallel Lives! Xavier and PsycheOut manage to get some of the parents together in order to form a support group. The problem: Shipwreck is one of the parents.


**I don't own any X-Men or GI Joe characters. Here's an idea I had from 'Parallel Lives' that never made it. Think of this as a deleted scene extra! Hey it was 100 chapters long! I just thought it was time to spotlight some of the parents that haven't got much screen time. **

If there is a scene you'd like to see (within the PG-13 rating of course) let me know. I do consider requests! 

**Family Therapy**

"Welcome everyone," Psyche-Out, GI Joe's resident shrink said to the group. "I'm so glad all of you could make it. This is a little experiment I wanted to try and I hope we can accomplish something today. This is my first parent support group so we are all going to be learning something today. You all know Professor Xavier; he will be assisting me in this group. Now why don't we all go around the room and introduce ourselves?" 

"Well," The woman in the first couple said. "I'm Katherine Pryde and this is my husband Richard. We have only one daughter, Kitty and she's a mutant. She can walk through walls." 

"I'm John Grey," A man with a moustache spoke. "And this is my wife Jennifer. We have two children, but only our older daughter Jean is a mutant. She's a telepath as well as a telekinetic." 

Each person and couple introduced himself or herself in a similar fashion. "I'm Samantha Smith," A blonde woman sighed. "My daughter has the ability to create energy bombs." 

"I'm Andrew Maddox and this is my wife Lenora. We have only one son. Or sometimes two or five depending on the circumstances. Our Jamie can make clones of himself." 

"I'm Viola Daniels and this is my husband Carl. My son is a mutant as well as my sister so it runs in the family. He can shoot off bone spikes from his body."

"Hey there! I'm Hector Delgato, but call me Shipwreck! I have five kids, all second-generation mutants. They all can breathe underwater and are pretty strong. My oldest can control water. I have no clue what else the others can do. When do we break out the beer?" 

"Not now Shipwreck," Psyche-Out groaned. "Next please?" 

"Um, I'm George Guthrie. My son is well…he's a regular human cannonball. That's the best way I can put it. I got seven kids, and Sam's a middle child. But he's the only one that's a mutant. So far as we know. His momma had to stay behind to look after the other young ones. And I'd like a beer to if you have one." 

"Oh lord. I'm Marvin Hinton, but call me Roadblock. I have a foster child that's a mutant. He has a long tongue, leaping legs, acid spit, goop spit and can climb on walls."

"Wow," Mr. Guthrie said. "And I thought my boy was weird." 

"What kind of talk is that?" Mr. Daniels snapped.

"Pretty honest talk," Shipwreck told him. "Let's face it, our kids are in no way normal. But that's not a bad thing. Hey what's wrong with being weird? Normal is way over rated! Weirdoes of the world unite!" 

"We're talking about mutancy, not insanity Shipwreck!" Xavier snapped. 

"The two aren't exactly unrelated," Ms. Smith groaned. 

"Now look here," Xavier said. "The point of this is to have parents come together and see how normal our children are."

"Normal?" Shipwreck looked at him. "My kids are able to breathe underwater! How is that normal?"

"Yeah!" Mrs. Smith said. "There is no way making energy bombs is normal!"

"Or shooting bone spikes out of his body," Mr. Daniels groaned.

"Or walking through walls," Mr. Pryde groaned. 

"Or having a tongue that can reach all the way across a room," Roadblock said.

"I meant that besides their abilities, these are in every other way like any other children!" Xavier explained. "They have the same feelings and desires and they act just like normal children."

"You have obviously never spent any time with my triplets," Shipwreck groaned.

"Triplets?" Mrs. Pryde asked.

"Yeah I got a set of triplets," He explained. "They're geniuses. They also have an annoying habit of experimenting on strangers."

"What kind of…?" Mr. Daniels started to ask.

"Trust me," Roadblock groaned. "You don't want to know!" 

"Wait a minute," Mrs. Daniels asked. "You have five children that are all mutants? And three of them are triplets?"

"Yup," Shipwreck nodded. "My oldest is fifteen and my youngest isn't even two yet." 

"That's nothing," Mr. Guthrie waved. "Try seven kids sometime!" 

"Well at least you're still married!" Shipwreck snapped. "At least your wife didn't run off with some rich jerk from Atlantis! And left you with all your kids, alone!" 

"Well there is that," Mr. Guthrie nodded. "You have a point." 

"Wait, Atlantis?" Mrs. Maddox asked. "You mean Atlanta?"

"No Atlantis," Shipwreck said. "As in under the sea. It's a long story." 

"Yeah and we don't want to hear it!" Roadblock said. 

"Speak for yourself," Mr. Guthrie said. "I wanna hear this!" 

"People please!" Xavier interrupted. "I think we're getting a bit off track here."

"Now wait a minute," Psyche-Out said. "I mean parents of mutants have normal problems too! Shipwreck has a valid point. I mean stress from raising children does have an effect on marriage."

"It wasn't stress that drove my wife into the arms of another man!" Shipwreck snapped. "It was the size of his bank account and fancy titles! Then she decided she didn't want to be a mother anymore! Just said it right to my face so loud the kids overheard and took off! " 

"Well at least your ex was honest," Mrs. Smith groaned. "My husband only wanted my daughter around so he could use her to steal things! What a jerk!"

"Let me guess, you had to get married too?" Shipwreck asked.

"Bingo," Mrs. Smith groaned. "I was sixteen and three months pregnant."

"Well at least you didn't get hitched in the delivery room," Shipwreck told her. "You know we have a lot in common. You wanna get some dinner after the meeting?" 

"SHIPWRECK THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A SUPPORT GROUP! NOT A SINGLES BAR!" Xavier shouted.

"Well where else am I gonna get a halfway decent date?" Mrs. Smith snapped. "Yeah here's a great line, 'Oh by the way, I have a teenage daughter that can blow up things with energy bombs. That's not gonna be a problem is it?' Yeah that'll send all the men flocking my way!" 

"I never thought of that," Mr. Maddox said. 

"What?" Mrs. Maddox asked, glaring at him.

"I mean our kids dating," He said. "I mean think how hard it will be for them. I mean Jamie alone is going to have problems. Can you imagine what will happen if a girl finds out there can be more than one of him?"

"Well in my experience that's not necessarily a problem," Mrs. Smith smirked. 

"That's another issue our children need to deal with," Psyche-Out said. "Trust and dating. Anyone else want to share their thoughts on this?"

"Well my kid has no problems with that," Roadblock groaned.

"With a twelve foot long tongue I'll say," Mrs. Smith snickered. 

"Actually he's dating my eldest," Shipwreck said. "Trust me. They were made for each other. Not like Kitty and her on again, off again relationship with that Alvers nut."

"Alvers?" Mr. Pryde sat up. "Wait, I know that name? Where have I heard that name before?"

"I don't know how you could forget," Shipwreck told him. "Lance Alvers. He's the one who dropped a building on top of you."

"Wait!" Mrs. Pryde yelped. "That Alvers? That hoodlum who was using Kitty to steal test answers?"

"That's the one!" Shipwreck said. 

"WHAT?" Mr. Pryde shouted. "SHE WAS DATING THAT MANIAC?!" He glared at Xavier. "WHAT KIND OF A CRAZY SCHOOL ARE YOU RUNNING HERE?" 

"Mr. Pryde please," Xavier sighed. "Calm down."

"CALM DOWN? CALM DOWN? MY SWEET PRECIOUS DAUGHTER WHO I ENTRUSTED TO YOU TO KEEP SAFE WAS DATING THAT JUVENILLE DELINQUENT WHO NEARLY KILLED US ALL AND YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN?" Mr. Pryde screamed. 

"Richard calm down," Mrs. Pryde groaned. "I mean my parents weren't exactly thrilled when we started dating now, remember?"

"Why not?" Shipwreck asked.

"Oh he had a record in juvenile court," Mrs. Pryde waved. "He also set fire to my dad's car." 

"That was an accident and you know it!" Mr. Pryde fumed. "Besides I did a lot of stupid things when I was growing up! But that's beside the point!"

"Sounds like the exact same point to me," Mrs. Smith cracked. "You know I thought this meeting would be a lot of baloney but this has turned out to be rather entertaining," She took a swig of beer. 

"Okay who smuggled in the beer?" Psyche Out shouted. "SHIPWRECK!"

"What?" Shipwreck asked.

"I'll have some of that," Mr. Pryde said. 

"Richard!" Mrs. Pryde glared. 

"Don't start with me Katherine," Mr. Pryde took the beer. "I need this!" He took a swig.

"Atta boy!" Shipwreck took a drink. "Hey it could be worse, she could have ended up with a dip like Duncan!"

"Who's Duncan?" Asked Mrs. Grey.

"That jerk of a teenager who was dating Jean," Shipwreck said. "You know, captain of the football team. Turned out to be a bigot who was dating a couple of cheerleaders behind Jean's back."

"I thought Scott was Jean's boyfriend!" Mr. Grey said.

"Actually she was just stringing the two of them along at the same time," Shipwreck said. 

"WHAT?" Mr. and Mrs. Grey shouted.

"So you see Pryde, at least your daughter is dating only one guy, who I might add worshiped the ground she walked on," Shipwreck said. "I mean he did anything to get her attention. Okay the soccer incident backfired, but when he joined the X-Men for a while…"

"HE WHAT?" Mr. Pryde glared at Xavier.

"WHAT SOCCER INCIDENT?" Mr. Grey glared at Xavier too.

"Thanks a lot Shipwreck," Xavier moaned. "It was nothing really…"

"Yeah they just set the school gym on fire," Shipwreck cackled. 

"Now **I **need a drink," Mr. Grey groaned, reaching for a beer bottle. 

"I need another," Mr. Pryde got another bottle. 

"From what I've heard this Lance guy wasn't so bad," Shipwreck kept going. "He even saved your daughter's life a couple of times. Like when that experiment of yours backfired Xavier and those monsters were running loose. Of course the gym got wrecked again but…" 

"WHAT?" Mr. Pryde screamed. "MONSTERS? EXPERIMENTS? XAVIER WHAT KIND OF A NUTHOUSE ARE YOU RUNNING HERE?" 

"Shipwreck I know you are trying to help," Xavier groaned. "But please…DON'T!" 

"Well this explains a lot," Mrs. Daniels snapped. "Now I know why Evan's been acting up so much. How could he not with all the insanity going on! Maybe I should have taken him back home! It would be a lot safer! I'm gonna kill my sister!" 

"Wow, destruction and chaos and teen troublemakers," Mrs. Smith snickered. "And I thought my kid would have trouble fitting in!" 

"Yeah same for my kid," Mr. Guthrie said. "So what's my kid been up to?"

"Um, Mr. Guthrie perhaps later I can give you a personal progress report," Xavier said. "Now is not the time."

"I wasn't asking you, I was asking Shipwreck over there," Mr. Guthrie pointed. "He seems to know the skinny of what's going on."

"Not much after the joyride in the X-Jet," Shipwreck told him.

"In the what?" Mr. Guthrie asked.

"He and a couple other kids were taking joyrides," Shipwreck explained. "The last one was in this big fancy jet they have. The one you rode in to get here."

"He was flying in that jet?" Mr. Guthrie said. "Sweet! How fast did it go?"

"What?" Mr. Grey yelped.

"Oh come on," Mr. Guthrie said. "Now I ain't saying that it wasn't wrong but which one of us boys hasn't borrowed a fancy car from the folks to try it out?"

"I know Richard did," Mrs. Pryde said. 

"I never did that!" Xavier snapped.

"Gee what a shock," Shipwreck drawled. "Course there was a pretty girl with them and…"

"Say no more," Mr. Guthrie chuckled. 

"Please," Xavier groaned. 

"Yeah," Shipwreck took another beer. "Of course they shouldn't have tangled with those military jets. But it was an accident that they fired those missiles. Well actually Lance did that too. You see he and Kitty were…"

"WHAT?" Mr. Pryde screamed. "I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANY MORE! I AM OUT OF HERE!" 

"Cool!" Shipwreck got up and followed him out the door. "I know a bar."

"Wait for me!" Mr. Grey got up and left with him too. 

"My sister is so dead!" Mrs. Daniels fumed. 

"Well I think we cleared the air on a lot of things," Psyche-Out said cheerfully. "I'd say we made progress today! Don't you think?"

"DO YOU PAY ATTENTION TO ANYTHING THAT GOES ON AROUND HERE?" Xavier snapped.

A few hours later, the kids were hanging around in the rec room when Althea got the call. "They're where? Oh great! Yeah we'll be over there with the bail money Roadblock! See ya!" 

"Bail money?" Kitty asked. "What's going on?"

"I have some bad news and really dumb news," Althea said. "The bad news is my dad told your dad about you and Lance."

"Oh great!" Kitty rolled her eyes. "And the really dumb news?"

"My dad and your dad got drunk and are now in jail," Althea sighed. "Oh yeah, your dad's there too Jean." 

"Oh god…" Jean rolled her eyes.

Twenty minutes later at the county jail. Three very hung over men were holding their heads in a jail cell while three very angry teenage girls were glaring at them.

"You are so busted!" Althea snapped. 

"DADDY!" Kitty screamed. "How could you?" 

"How could you run around with that Alvers boy?" Mr. Pryde snapped. "Ow…my head." 

"So that justifies you getting drunk?" Kitty snapped.

"But Althea's dad…" Mr. Grey whimpered.

"I don't care what Althea's dad does!" Jean snapped. "You're my dad and you are not playing with Shipwreck again! Got it? I can't believe how irresponsible you were!" 

"Guard can we stay here?" Shipwreck asked. "It's safer!" 


End file.
